I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
