i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
