Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize