he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
