Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
