he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize