So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
