And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
