Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
