so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
