Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
