i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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