let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
