Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize