Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize