Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize