Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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