He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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