kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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