how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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