so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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