ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
