Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
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