i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
He better not be in your backpack
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
