did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
