Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
