If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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