our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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