They should really pass out barf bags in church
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
