Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
