we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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