return my video game
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
