It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize