I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
