is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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