He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
