I wish I could punch you in the face.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
