Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
