whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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