fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
