By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
