Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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