smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize