I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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