Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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