From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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