I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
