If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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