My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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