i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
