Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
What a dumb baby whore.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
