She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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