Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
